Monday, 16 January 2012

Blues, greens and summer breezes - week two of grateful

Everyone who knows me knows that I can't stand the heat. Sultry, humid, scorching heat is oppressive for me and it puts me in a bad place. I haven't enjoyed the past two summers we've spent here, and after a beautiful winter I was dreading the summer.

But I've coped. Actually, it's been pretty good. Maybe my outlook's changed and I'm putting more of a positive spin on an Aussie summer than I did a year ago (you should have heard me!), or maybe it's because of where we live. There's always a breeze living right by the beach. It can make all the difference.

What I'm really grateful for are the amazing summer colours. Vivid greens and the bluest of blues cheer me up no end. And I've needed it almost on a daily basis.

I'm still as sleep deprived as when I started this blog. In fact, it's probably worse now. I'm in and out of bed. All night. Every night.

Last night, I had to settle Kian four or five times. And then he wakes at 6am.

It takes its toll after a year.

Carrying the big weight that he is in and out of the cot like I do has also been a strain on my body. My back went over Christmas and I couldn't move for two days. Then I sprained my hand. My legs are always aching and I've put on far too much weight.

I know it's not forever, but at times I'm so tired I just want to curl myself into a ball and cry.

And sometimes I do cry a little, especially when I'm feeling sorry for myself with Graeme working so far away in Sydney and there isn't anyone I can call for help.

But I get over it. I take Sydney for a walk and I stare at the ocean, at the sky and the green hills.

And then it's OK.


  1. The ocean is a wonderful place to take away all those worries. It's a calming place and even on a hot day with the breeze it feels cool and relaxing. Beautiful photo Vanessa

  2. It's so hard, Vanessa. I understand how depleting a non-sleeper can be. Doing it on your own must be very tough indeed. I'm glad you are cheered up so readily, it's a great attitude and, really, what else have we got?

    Thanks for joining in this week. I am enjoying your writing. x

  3. Those colours are amazing. You live in a beautiful part of Australia.

    I hope your back and hand and legs are feeling better soon. Frequent night waking is incredibly draining - I'm glad getting out for a walk helps oyu recharge. xx

  4. Oh, Vanessa! I know that incredibly tired feeling all too well. A little extra rest makes all the difference. I hope your body is on the path to healing, and you keep finding these beautiful moments to catch your breath.

    Take care!

  5. Vanessa, that is really tough. Sleep deprivation is cruel - no wonder you feel like crying. I hope you can try and catch some sleep during the day? And that your litle man sleeps better soon x


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